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User blog:AnnhilationNation/Joint Ops: Round 10: The Basterds (Inglourious Basterds) vs. Project Mayhem (Fight Club)
"The Basterds!!! Scalp taking Jewish-American guerilla squad, who is most known for killing the evil Adolf Hitler! Project Mayhem! Global anti-consumerism extremeists, who fight to give the world a proverbial kick in the ass! Who? Is? DEADLIEST?! Our Panel of experts will decide, using the latest of scientific gadgets, and data! No rules! No mercy! Only Survival of the Strongest! Who will be.... the deadliest warrior?!" Tale of the Tape... Weapons Used... Debating... FTS will take the spot of the Basterds' expert, while AN will be the expert for Project Mayhem. The Basterds do one thing, and we do it well. Kill quietly, and punish the wicked. Every member of the Basterds starts with a debt of at least 100 Nazi scalps, which most are more than happy to add even more, due to the fac tthat they were oppressed Jewish-Americans, or even some former Nazis, who killed their own men. Our weapons may be dated, but they will get the job done, nonetheless. So, you want to know abotu Project Mayhem? The First ruel of Project Mayhem is you do not ask questions. In Tyler We Trust. That's radical devotion, which carries them to extraordinary lengths in their combat and causes. Project Mayhem is a force to be reckoned with, and should have an easy victory, due to superior technology. Final Fight... Basterds: file:red.png file:red.png file:red.png file:red.png file:red.png Project: file:blue.png file:blue.png file:blue.png file:blue.png file:blue.png Lt. Aldo Raine, along with four inductees into the Guerilla force were seen scouting a museum that Project Mayhem was about to blow up. Aldo said to his comrades, "If there's one thing I hate... it's nazi's out of uniform." He puts up his binoculars, as he signals for the group to move in, as three walk in with MP40's, while one carries Dynamite, to seal off any potential exit. Meanwhile, various bombs are being placed in strategic places, as Tyler Durden overlooks his crew member's work, while holding a Smith and Wesson 4506. "Good job, space monkeys. Don't you love that feeling of destroying something beautiful?" One of his subordinates replies to him saying, "Yeah, I always felt like wiping my ass with the Mona Lisa"; as the bomb expert was working with the unstable nitroglycerin bombs. Two lookouts weild H&K MP5k sub-machineguns, as the other weilds a baseball bat, as he smashes an expensive Ming vase. In the room, Tyler shouts to the guy with the bat "Hey! Angel Face! Go smash up the vending machine in the lounge. Might as well, while we're here, huh?" Angel Face walked over to the lounge, as a loud smash was heard. However, little did they know, Aldo Raine and the Basterds were closing in. One of the Lookouts went over to grab some loot, as the bomb expert walked out with some brass knuckles in his hand, to take over lookout duties, when all of a sudden, two basterds lunged out with MP40's, easily dispatching bullets into both lookouts. file:blue.png file:blue.png(5-3) Durden was suprised, as he grabbed the remote to one of the bombs that his deceased comrade had just finished, and fired a round into the ceiling. "Go check that out." one Basterd said to the other, as one of the MP40 weilding troops creeped into the room where Tyler was just at. Tyler was creeped against the back of a wall, as he had a glimpse of the trooper, and his weapon, and detonated the bomb, promptly ****ing him up beyond all recognizition. file:red.png (4-3) The other MP40 weilding soldier started to head to the lounge, along with Aldo Raine. Meanwhile, the dynamite weilding Basterd set a charge for the exit, and set it for a minute and a half. He and another Basterd weilding an MP40 run off, as he takes a Walther P38 for himself. They both run into the area where the blast was heard, as a member of the Project was waiting, with an MP5k. He sneaks up and shoots the MP 40 weilding basterd to death. file:red.png (3-3) The Walther P38 weilding basterd fired a shot, however, it only left a wound, as the Project member dropped his gun. However, Tyler swung back around and laid two perfect shots with his Smith and Wesson. file:red.png (2-3) Tyler looked for hsi comrade, and saw him bleeding. He then said to him... "Go back to the house, get yourself patched up." The Project member got up and started to head for the exit, however, as he turned the corner, he seen a small clock on a bundle of three sticks of dynamite click to both hands reaching 12, as it explodes, blasting his torso from his waist in a gory fashion. file:blue.png (2-2) Hearing the blast, Aldo smirked, knowing an exit was sealed. He was right behind the MP 40 weilding soldier, while little did they know, Angel Face clenched his bat, and waited for an opportunity. He sees the barrel of the MP 40 come into picture, as he swings an overhead smash, and hits the Basterd in the temple with the baseball bat, causing internal hemmoraging, and death. file:red.png (1-2) Aldo jumped bacck, and tried to fire his Walther P38 twice, however he missed both shots, as the gun was knocked out of his hands. Aldo drew his bowie knife, and swiped at the enemy, however, he avoided the slash. Aldo then kicked him back into the room, and then ducked a swipe towards him. The Project member tried another shot to the head, however, Aldo ducked, and then stabbed his foe with the knife, letting him bleed to death. He removed his blade, and then quickly etched a crude swastika into his forehead before grabbing his pistol off the groundfile:blue.png (1-1) Aldo walked out, where Tyler heard gunshots and met him in the open lobby. Both started to unload the rest of their clips, hip firing, as neither made their mark, until Tyler manage to hit Aldo in the shoulder wtih his last bullet. Tyler walked over and punched Aldo, knocking him down to the ground, and started to reload his gun, when Aldo rolled over, and revealed a suprise within his white glove. He fired the shot, which penetrated Tyler's heart, killing him instantly. file:blue.png(1-0) Aldo gets up, and pulls out his knife, and begins to scalp Tyler Durden, before raising it pup to the sky with hsi good arm and screaming in victory. WINNER: The Basterds Expert's Verdict: While the Basterds have about 50 years of a technology disadvantage, their old fashioned killing know-how won the day for them. Category:Blog posts